As I sat and finished the last bite or two of my bacon and green apples this morning I suddenly thought “it’s Ash Wednesday! No, maybe it’s Tuesday. Nope, nope yesterday we had live lessons. It’s definitely not Tuesday. It’s definitely Wednesday. Ash Wednesday! And, yes you just ate all that bacon.” With a light- hearted grin I thought “Oh well you have already started, so you might as well finish the last bite.”
In the grand scheme of things am I really going to end up in hell or does it even matter that I ate bacon on Ash Wednesday, probably not. What matters though is that even in the recognition of my mistake, I still moved forward with it.
So, does that make me a sinner? Absolutely! We do it all the time, most of us anyway. We think one small disregard for, one blatant indiscretion will go unnoticed, but the fact is that God sees all. He knows all. Even greater sometimes is that our heart and soul see and know it too.
Even without faith, even without God we know the difference between right and wrong. There are of course differences in ideology, but for the most part if you are disrespectful to yourself or another person you know it’s wrong. If you take something that isn’t yours, long for something that you can’t have, get caught in circles and places that you shouldn’t be; you know that it is wrong.
Why then do we do it? Is it because we like to feel guilt and shame? Is it because we like to live in fear and blame? Is it a whole host of other reasons? I am not sure. And, I really don’t know what the answer is, other than it’s different for each of us.
I do know however, that most of us sin and most of us get caught in that sin; regardless, of whether someone catches us, or we get caught in the cycle of guilt, shame, and loneliness. It’s not a fun place to be and is certainly one where fear can set in in a hurry.
It is a place though where forgiveness meets us at the door. We talked last week about opening a door. This week you don’t even have to walk all that far. Just knock on the door of your latest moment where you felt frustrated, where you felt anger, where you felt guilt, where you felt shame. Somewhere in all of that is where you will find love and forgiveness. Grab hold of that feeling and don’t let it go. Then carry that with you into the next door, and into the next one and into the one after that.
And, if you make a mistake and eat one more bite of bacon, get angry, or find yourself caught in a spiral, then moving forward prayerfully work to be more disciplined and continue on with light and love in your heart.
For more work on learning to forgive click here for the activity for the heart.
Ya'll have a beautiful day!
All My Love,
Jen
To view On Fire For Life|Week 7 Day 2| Learning to Forgive click here.
To view the On Fire For Life series click here.
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